You'll be happy to know that I sent Colt McCoy a picture of my Heisman Trophy with a note that said "Merry Christmas, Colt. This is the closest you'll ever get to holding one of these puke-face! Best wishes, Tim Tebow." Haha! He'll hate Tebow now as much as I do.
Anywho, I hope you utilized my last minute Christmas ideas below and brought tears to your friends and families' eyes upon receiving one of my great gift ideas below. I passed out some ninja throwing stars to all the kids at a local shelter in Oklahoma City and besides the one incident involving a stray cat taking a star to the face, there were no other mishaps whatsoever. Even that was no big deal because this world with one less stray cat is a one-less-stray-cat better world to live in now.
A couple of important BCS Championship preparation notes that I discovered while doing research:
If you youtube "Sam Bradford," there is "about" 886 videos of me doing my thang. I've spent the last six days watching those.
If you google "Sam Bradford," there is "about" 1,070,000 sites that contain something containing my name. I have little DeMarco going through every site and giving me a report on what's out there on the internet about me. He's not doing anything anyway with his missing hamstring.
One other thing I've been pondering during this Christmas break, which seems to be on the mind of many football fans, is should I remain at OU next year or go pro? Most everyone has failed to even include a third and very viable option. Let me discuss it with you first right here on my blog...
As most of you know, I am one-sixteenth Cherokee Indian. Well, my agent (ooops, what I meant to say was a person working on my behalf for no money whatsoever) is working on a deal and has put it on the table (no pun intended) to the Cherokee Tribe to be the national spokesman and part owner of the Cherokee Casinos. I would like to be one-sixteenth owner and share in one-sixteenth of all the profits that my tribe makes off of the stupid white man. In return, I will make appearances, sign autographs, play chef, and be an occasional entertainer at these casinos.
My indian peeps are raking in some serious cash from these entertainment resorts and as one-sixteenth Cherokee, I believe I am entitled to some of the ownership and profits. Can you imagine how many new gambling degenerates I could attract if they put my face on these casinos. We would bury the Choctaw Casinos! And, by the way, the Choctaw suck! Who was their last Heisman Trophy winner? Huh? That's what I thought! Nobody!
Just to help me get properly motivated for the BCS game, I am pretending that Tim Tebow is Choctaw, Percy Harvin is Comanche, and Urban Meyer is Creek. I'm putting my crimson and cream warpaint on and I'm going to battle on January 8th!
So, before you go out and argue about whether I should go pro or stay at OU, just remember that I may forget both of those options and embark on a goal to put Oklahoma on the map as the most gambling state in America.
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