That's right, britches. I won my own award yesterday - The Sammy Award for best damn quarterback on the planet. Apparently the name of the trophy is the Sammy Baugh trophy. I am going to have my personal engraver etch in my last name over the "augh" portion, because I think it's stupid for a quarterback that played back in the 1800's to have his own trophy.
This Sammy Blaugh dude couldn't carry my jock if he was playing today. He would have transferred to Southwest Hellhole State University by now trying to get some playing time.
That Sammy wore a rubber helmet, and played his games in gravel pits with a ball of twine. This Sammy wears a real football helmet (only because the rules state he has to), plays on the best football field in America, and throws footballs so hard that it makes the wind hurt.
Seriously, look at some of the names of the past winners:
Colt Brennan - Hawaii - what a joke; I was better as a Putnam North sophomore
Stefan Lefors - Louisville - who?
Kliff Kingsbury and BJ Symons - TTech - those guys have been awesome pros! (warning to Graham Harrell)
Chris Weinke - Fla St. - remember when Torrence Marshall scared the 33 year old Weinke so bad before the game that their offense couldn't even score on OU in the BCS championship game?
Ryan Leaf - Wash St. - I think he's dead
If these names are indicative of the type of talent that typically wins this award, I may choose to return it so that it doesn't jinx me.
Anyway, my apologies to any of Sammy Dagobah's relatives that may be reading this truth right now. Thanks for the hardware anyway. For now, it'll go right between the bronze bust of my head and the picture of me wresting a great white shark in the Pacific Ocean on my parents' fireplace mantle.
No comments:
Post a Comment